Wednesday, 29 September 2010

The Busy and the Stress

Damn it's hard to write a decent post without being near a computer. I spend most of the day away from my laptop so often times I'll have to make do with sending a post from my android (not a real robot no, that would be silly. It's an operating software I have installed in my baguette).
A friend of mine recommended I read the bible to relax and use as advice for my daily struggles, so I killed him. Now I'm not saying the bible is a useless fiction book which only a mindless drone should use to determine how to live their life. Because really, it's more of a collection of books if anything.
I may, in future, write a post in the form of a song or rap. You know what they say: It ain't no crime to rhyme, if you got the time, to your lyrical pinnacle you should climb.
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Tuesday, 28 September 2010

Answers, answers everywhere

I'm going to use this post to answer a few questions I've been getting lately.

What's it like being a Dream Weaver?
Okay, I guess. I'm my own boss and I get to decide which projects I take on. There is a hierarchy system in play but the work is pretty much independant. I've only needed partners once in my entire career as a weaver.
How much do you get paid?
Depends on the task. It isn't cheap working on really demanding projects such as being king of the dinosaurs or leading the rebel alliance against the sith. I once had a request from a man who wished he could speak with a scottish accent and shout out obscenities at a Berlin international film festival. It didn't cost him a penny.
How does one become a Dream Weaver?
I can't tell you how to start out as a weaver because every weaver's initiation is unique, but I can tell you it takes many years of practise and hard work. A senior member of the Dream Weaver Council (the DWC) will contact you and put you through trials to test your potential. After a few years of training you must sit a couple of exams involving dream making and punching tiger woods in the face, without him knowing, in the middle of his U.S open. If you pass, you will be awarded a Dream Weaver certificate and one million dollars in monopoly money.
What is the hardest project you've worked on so far?
It would have to be when Sarah Palin asked to be president and not get shot within 24 hours. It was too big a task for one man alone. I had to assemble a team of weavers to bring Gandalf to life and have him turn all her enemies into super nintendo entertainment systems.
What is love?
Baby don't hurt me. Don't hurt me. No more.

That's it for today. If you have any questions you'd like to ask me feel free to let me know in the comments section and I'll make another Q&A post sometime in the following days to come.
Aisling  :)

Monday, 27 September 2010

First impressions

Funny thing about personas; you can build a character of a person from just one look. From as little as a hairstyle or the colour of their apparel, most of us will judge a person and be adamant we have their identity. Until, of course, new information is thrown in the mix.
The old idiom of "don't judge a book by it's cover" can hit us hard when forced into a conversation made awkward by our preconceived notions, as I was reminded of on my way home last night when a passenger next to me on the train asked to borrow the paper adjacent to my right shoulder.
"Excuse me, could you pass me the paper to your right, please?"
The soft tone in his voice took me by surprise as I was expecting more of a, "oi, muppet!".
"Certainly, sir. Here you go.", I replied, trying to break any comparisons he may have made of me to a typical youth from East London.
This post was originally meant to be about how quick I am to judge others but it span out of control. In future I'll try to be less judgmental. Good night everyone :)
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Sunday, 26 September 2010

It ain't easy making dreams.

First of all I'd like to thank everyone who took the time out of their busy schedule to leave comments on my posts :) .
Making dreams is a full-time commitment and it sucks up most hours of my days. However much time I do have left is spent on teaching young, underprivileged giraffes how to fly. It keeps them off the streets.
If you have an idea for a dream you would like to experience, let me know. Oh and please don't be offended if I don't reply to your comment/PM right away; I'm swamped for the day and won't be near a computer til 18:00(GMT) .
Sweet dreams :)
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Saturday, 25 September 2010

Funny Guy

Went to see Russell Peters live at the O2 last night. His performace was funny as usual but he did tend to drag on a bit with a few of his jokes. Still this was trivial compared to the laughs he garnered from the audience.
On the way to the event I bought a chess set (to the dismay of my friends) and played chess at a starbucks in hopes of embarrasing my friends, making passers by green with envy and attracting a crowd around a board game. Unfortunately the starbucks we went to was smaller than the one I had in mind and the only table available was in a corner where nobody could see us play. Had I worn a funny hat the outcome may have turned out differently.
That's all I have to say for now. I'm off to work; those dreams won't weave themselves you know.

New blog

Hey everyone (that's right I'm talking to you, Earth's population), this is my first attempt at jumping into the online social network. I'll use this blog to talk about my day and, at times, go on a rant about how life's little misfortunes often snowball and have me rolling around in comedic misery, or maybe bring your attention to an interesting occurance you may have missed out on due to being busy or living hundreds of miles away. In any case I'll try to make this corner on the internet as entertaining as I can. It's late now so good night and don't be a stranger.